Picking a man is like shopping for a dress!

I always say picking a man is like buying an item of clothing. You walk into a store that has rows and rows of clothes in every size, style, fabric and colour. Each one sporting it’s own price tag. Each one creating a unique interaction with your feelings. Then there’s the shop assistant, armed and at the ready to sell you anything and everything your fluttering eyes repose on. But with years of shopping and of hearing remarks from your friends and foes, and with those indelible memories of previous wardrobe accidents , your practiced instincts remind you of your specs and you keep to form, buying only what fits your build,matches your emotional disposition and accentuates your gifts(hmmm!). At that point you’re a buyer who knows what you want. You just go for it when you see it.You know what fits you.

It’s the same science really whether you’re shopping for a man or a cute number. No offense guys but that’s the way i see it. I just hope y’all will indulge me while i explore the thought. There’s always a dress in the shop that is meant for you. That one that you think to yourself after you’ve snagged it: “what a find!".It looks right, fits right and feeeeels right!

I actually related the same analogy to one of my platonic boyfriends . Boy, it sparked good conversation! We had been trading stories and the conversation steered itself to shirts, well in his case, dresses and other prospecting merchandise( now i’m about to get into trouble). The question was; if you know your shirt and he (sorry it) doesn’t notice you, would you go for it? You know what i said? I said why not? (OMG girl, that was said like a big spender!). Now I know what they say about finding and being found and i totally agree BUT i’m only saying if it gives a perfect fit, and it’s hanging idly and unclaimed in that store paying you none to minimal attention, then get into it’s space or at least ask the shop keeper about it! Hallelujah!

I know GF(girl friend) is going to kill me when she reads this but will someone let me tell it as it is?

“if it’s yours it will come to you” ,

that’s true but ain’t nothing wrong with helping it along! Can i get a witness! You might want to get your charm on, smile some and shine teeth!(Nike, you’re totally shameless!).Erhm, somebody stop me before i get into more trouble!

A word of caution. Slow and subtle wins the race here cos you don’t want the shirt to know prematurely ( might ruin the negotiation!).The first commandment is don’t get caught trying.The second commandment is don’t take another sistas shirt.(Why would you do that? What’s wrong with you?).

I should warn you too that there’s the kind of shirt to pass up on. Those stiff- necked and stuffy shirts, all starched up and aloof, so emotionally wound up tight that the coyest smile would fall flat in thin air before it got through! Lord help the sista who falls for that kind of shirt. Armed so it can’t be disarmed! Lordavmarcy!!! There’s also the slacked shirt. It’s the “slacker” brand of T-shirts. If you have a taste for them you probably always find yourself stuck between the friend zone and the promised land of romantic bliss. It’s a yo-yo relationship but that’s for another day.

One more thing. An experienced shopper goes for the best buy at the right price. Neither overrated and pricey nor undervalued and cheap! I always feel a lift after a day of shopping when i’m taking home the bounty knowing it was the best buy and i got it at the best price. I feel proud it's money well spent. Mmmhh just talking about it puts me in the mode for shopping (don’t ask what i’ll be shopping for!). Lastly, while an experienced shopper has a knack for picking the shirt that makes her look like a million dollars in it, it is an expert shopper who makes the shirt think she never had an eye on it in the first place!(Chuckles).

Don’t ask me if i’m talking from experience, I already feel like i confessed to a hideous crime on this post! Ah, the things i do for writing a good piece! Hope you enjoyed it.So long!

P.S
What would you do to get the attention of a dress or shirt who doesn’t know you exist?